I’m coming more to terms that I’m whiny and entitled. I don’t have my life together, but I pretend that I do. I need to be nicer, and a better person deep down. I often behave like a downer, because I have high hopes and little action.

I read in the Alumni magazine about a student who I’ve often admired for their confidence and humor and discovered that the said individual does not come from a privileged background.

God reveals his goodness:

Today on the bus, I overheard two women talking about how they met their current husbands. One woman said her husband used to be the guy friend of the boy friend. The other woman said her husband was the guy she met her first day of sophomore year at a party. She accidentally spilled juice on his clean shirt. The rest of the night, he introduced her and called her, the girl who poured juice over him. The first woman succinctly said, “Life has to be crazy sometimes, but that’s what makes it work. Things turn out better because of it.” And I realize this post-graduation stress is driving me crazy, but there’s some beauty in it, that I don’t see yet. What do I see?

1. Appreciation/gratitude

2. Connecting with people, and being happy with the happy who want to connect with me, and not wanting abstract things like power, fame, etc. (i.e. things that fade).

3. The value of listening

4. Social justice.

Yet, I’m also torn with my love for economic security (AKA: I am greedy and see that money does make things work).

Alas, the age old reliance on God vs. reliance on self. One thing is for sure though.

Goals for self:

bringing the best out of myself and helping to bring out the best in others.

I think volunteer work also rocks.

Lots of editing, but I will do that. I just need to put my thoughts into coherent sentences for now.


About ivtravels

I like questions, dreaming, doing things, and trying new experiences. Ask me.
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