Score! What can I say? I just did an exercise in focus. The flow was orgasmic. (Although I must say, it feels strange to use that word in any type of writing, just about anywhere).
Case? One tab open, just focused on typing the blog entry “One Place” in one go, without interrupting myself, except to look up words. This instance suggests 1) I can indeed focus and 2) Focus is great. Let’s do it again some time.
One of the reasons I don’t focus on things is because it’s painful. Whatever exercise I’m doing, it’s usually difficult either emotionally, physically, or intellectually. thus, I distract myself with at least 5 other things. Result? I never get through any of it. Moreover, I end up reinforcing how painful the exercise is by lengthening the time until completion.
I also want to take a writing class. Particularly one in E.B. White. I also need to check my logic book. My logic is everywhere, not unlike my words. (;D, I’m also starting to understand and use the double negative in my language and speech, exemplifying my understanding of it). Hooray, as my boss/co-worker once said, it’s all a matter of adjusting. I seriously need to be nicer to this man. This man is a genius. Seriously. And I need to do my thinking, form my own thoughts, lest I appear an idiot in front of him.
Also, I seriously need to find myself. Identity-wise. I’ve been floating in people’s shadows unhappily for too many years. I have my own ideas, I am smart, and I am happy. I don’t need to prove this to anyone. Wow, the timid ideas in the back of my mind suddenly come out from the closets as I have focus. Score 2 for focus.