Upset about Injustices

I’m pissed mostly about the injustices of the world. I don’t think I’ve ever been this angry. Question I should constantly ask myself, “how much money do I need to survive?”, “How much food do I need to eat?” Answer to first question, probably more because of health insurance and car insurance. Health insurance is necessary as is dental insurance. Car insurance might not be as necessary if I live in the city. I only need enough food to keep me nourished and the not hungry. That’s it. Not hungry. Why do my friends always insist on eating out? What is up with this? Ok, fine, I’ll got out tomorrow with my buddies but after that I’m going to make it a once a month treat. I just can’t handle it anymore. Both in terms of my wallet but also in terms of what I end up eating. There is no need for me to eat steak or truffle oil or what not all the time. No need. It’s outrageous. OK? I hate eating out. In the future, I’m only eating out to learn the flavorings. Like Midori from Murakami’s Norwegian wood. Yes, I want to be that girl who only has one bra because she’s saving to by quality kitchen ware– like knives to bone fish or a wok. I want to be like that. I’m suddenly very nostalgic for Grinnell. In the sense that it was cool NOT to use money there. Like hip. I want to be like that again. and always. I guess I just want to be able to have money, but not use it for things like eating out. Or only occassionally. Because if you eat out all the time then the concept loses its luster. I am for the logarithmic curve and diminishing returns. I am strange I guess but w/e. I don’t need to burn money on these type of things. Yea, I seriously want to go work in India or something like that. Nothing against India, or any countries. no take that back, I’m going to Quebec. I decided this a bit ago. I’m not that pumped about Peru or the Spanish language. Sure it’s cool and what not. I probably should learn it. but i know that i want to learn FRench and really well. I’m going there. Only my parents and one other person knows this. I’m going to do it. I really hate spending money. Maybe I only say this when i’m full or something. Because i’m full on pizza and OJ. All I want is to be healthy and well educated and have enough money to pay for health insurance and take vacations to place. i want to travel and eat there. not here. i want to learn a culture and i want to learn a language well. i want to be able to be considered fluent enough in that area to be considered a local after a period of time. what kind of life would afford me to do this? i really don’t know. i want the world to be safe. i don’t want violence or any of that. i hate politics. i want equality. i want things to be fair. i really want them to be fair. i am angry at the injustices of the world. i’m terribly upset. i want people to live peacefully with each other. i want to work hard and keep my mind sharp. i’m really greedy. i want people to love each other, and if not then to tolerate their presence, or to just move away. something like that. i hate how the economy is in the dumps.  i do want to become a practicing physician. i want to be able to save lives– i’m really not all that interested in money anymore. the only thing i’m interested in is health care. like i want good health insurance. but i think that’s all i want my $ for. That and some time to take a vacation. but i don’t think i’m asking for too much. (@ least i hope not). I want to be smart, but it’s not important (well kind, only for the respect and lack of disaparing comments and stares) because reality is what i make of it and what i do not what i say to others or what i say. i’m going to run everyday, rain or shine because i need to take care of my body. i need to be well enough to study intensely for an hour or two. i’m afraid of getting old, but not in the ‘beautiful’ sense. i’m afraid i’ll lose my mind, which i value more than any other body part. i want to have kids. i want to be able to tutor them or teach them at home. i want to be able to have the financial means to have freedom. i don’t want to be constrained by economic limitations. yes, so i’m going to work hard now, create the financial means for the future. end of rant.


About ivtravels

I like questions, dreaming, doing things, and trying new experiences. Ask me.
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