note to self (what I really want)

i sometimes think all i want to do is to earn lots of money, have freedom to travel, have 3 kids, grow them up in the suburbs and then be all normal. admittedly, my parents (my immediate environment) reinforce this stereotype and the need to conform. However, today I was forced to reevaluate what exactly I want out of life. Certainly my statement sounds extremely selfish. However, my tears of anger and frustration tell me something about myself. I want to have fun and have an interesting life. Whether T. ferriss or M. Tucker actually have fulfilling lives or they just market themselves is irrelevant. I want to travel and become fluent and focus more than anything else in the world. I really want to one day work for Doctors without Borders. I really want to understand healthcare and administer it. I want a simple life above everything else- yes i do want to afford healthcare and these things, which the traditonal route would allow me to do, but I am 23. I’m young and I am as someone else put it, at this age only responsible for myself. I am, nevertheless, paralyzed into inaction and have little to show for 2 years since graduation.

Admittedly has become my favorite coined expression recently since receiving an well-expression email with this word. If anything, the one thing that will be changed because of the tears and anger. I’m checking my e-mail 2 times a day maximum. I’m not going to be tethered to it anymore. I will not care whether my brother responds to my emails or anyone as for that matter as long as I get to do all the fun and interesting things in life. In fact, I used to envy people who went to get academic degrees had high GPAs. I still do. But I admire people who have confidence and faith to jump out of the original route.


About ivtravels

I like questions, dreaming, doing things, and trying new experiences. Ask me.
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